I’ll give you one guess on what I’m dealing with today! Yep – health anxiety.
This time, it’s been brought on by my period. Which usually my period is almost a relief because I know all the stomach issues and tiredness I’m feeling is for a reason. But this time, it came early and has been pretty light.
I told my friend this, and she joked that I must be pregnant. (Is this a symptom of pregnancy? I’m too nervous to look it up, honestly.) If I’m looking at it logically, it’s highly unlikely. We haven’t had sex that much this month and we use protection. Everything else is on track, except that it’s early and light. But that little comment was just enough for me to be freaked out about it all day yesterday and today.
I’ve been trying to talk myself down from the fear. Not only is it highly unlikely, but even if it IS true, it’s not the end of the world. But even as I type this, the thought of being pregnant, I can feel my adrenaline surge with fear.
It’s funny because I’m not against the idea of having kids. I had a pregnancy scare a couple years ago, and I remember waiting for the result and I wasn’t nervous at all. I thought “Eh, if I am, nbd.” I think right now is tougher because I’ve been having so many bodily function fears that the idea of adding more chaos is frightening. Right now, I’m just doing that thing where I’m excited for 10:30 to roll around so I can go to bed and relax, and hopefully tomorrow I can chill out.